


we know we’ll still collide in the end

by noctalia



Series: the universe ain't big enough (for me to lose you) [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Space, Denial of Feelings, Feels, Idiots in Love, It's very light, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Space Opera, Space Stations, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Unresolved Romantic Tension, a lot of what went wrong is in the past, and they basically can't do anything about it, but there's spaceships and space stations, honestly they're just having a Moment (tm), it hurts still, not that they go to explore anything, sorta - Freeform, there's a bit of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-14 00:47:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28912569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noctalia/pseuds/noctalia
Summary: A space station, a dozen units of spaces marines, the inescapable dread of being caught, an unplanned encounter, secrets spilled in the dark, a kiss. This could be the perfect recipe for disaster.Or; Ten gets held up while trying to get back to his crew by no other than Johnny Suh, and maybe history won't repeat itself.
Relationships: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Series: the universe ain't big enough (for me to lose you) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2144211
Comments: 6
Kudos: 25
Collections: Challenge #4 — Awaken The World





	we know we’ll still collide in the end

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer - I do not own any of the characters, this work is not representative of who NCT members are either, I'm just borrowing them for a little while.
> 
> Spaces Marines in this have absolutely nothing in common with Warhammer 40K Space Marines, I just though the name sounded cool. They're basically Marines but in space. I mention a zwarlek boudoir at some point, it's not a reference to anything, they're just a kind of aliens whose primarily business is selling tobacco and drugs and are completely my own invention.
> 
> The title is from Asteroid by IMLAY and Yangyang, which seemed only fitting as it's a WayV centric round.
> 
> A special thank you to my beta, Clarie, who's been so kind and amazing.

“We need to stop meeting like this.”

Ten was half-hidden in a corridor of the space station. His hidden spot was perfect to assess the situation before deciding on the next course of action. It should have been enough for anyone not paying attention to him, not _looking for_ him. 

But of course, there was always one that would be looking for him.

“Johnny.”

The taller man was only a few feet away, in full space marine gear. Ten would be lying if he didn’t find him extremely _hot_ , and Ten hardly ever lied—well, except when playing poker.

Johnny was getting closer so Ten took a few steps back to hide from view even more.

“I’m getting the idea that you like being in trouble so I can find you in the strangest places.”

He just stepped into the exact place Ten was a few seconds before with a small smirk on his face, knowing perfectly well that he was standing between Ten and the exit. Technically, there was the other end of the corridor but that would mean taking a big detour inside the station and Ten didn’t have time for that.

“And what if I am?”

The tone was light, but they both knew it held a _much_ deeper meaning. They looked at each other, fully aware of all the things unsaid between them like smoke in a zwarlek boudoir. 

“Then I guess I should keep on looking for you anytime I’m sent on a mission.”

He took another step forward and Ten took one backwards. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of him, partly because he was _dangerous_ and partly because he was dangerously _attractive_. But Ten wasn’t stupid enough to be seduced in such a drastic situation. Or was he?

“It would feel awfully useless if I’m not your target, Johnny.”

“What makes you think you're not my target?”

In any other situation, Ten would have laughed. He would have laughed, winked, maybe sent a kiss in Johnny’s direction, and would have been gone in a flash, slipping like water between his fingers. But the situation was different and Ten felt the laughter die out in his throat. 

“Because if I was, you would have already handcuffed me or done something to stop me from fighting you.”

They had never stopped moving, Johnny taking more and more steps slowly forward and Ten matching him with steps backwards. What he had not anticipated was that Johnny was indeed much taller than him and, by extension, took wider steps than him. He only realized this when Johnny was way too close for Ten to make a run for it.

“Have you ever considered that I might not want to hand you to my higher-ups?”

Truth to be told, Ten _did_. 

He often asked himself what would have happened if life had been different, if he would have let himself have a chance at happiness, if he had never ran away in the middle of the night. He also asked himself what would happen if Johnny ever decided to leave his life and the Space Marines to join him and the rest of the crew—if they could be _happy_. 

“I can’t be what you want, Johnny.”

The moment those words escaped Ten’s lips they both froze. 

(It took them back to another night, hushed whispers in the dark and fumbling hands trying to hold on to the moment.

Then, night after night, stolen kisses and empty promises that kept them coming back for more.

More heartache, more pain, more _history_ they would have had to bury.

The same words echoing between them as Ten was packing up, one last goodbye, bittersweet, like the rest of everything they had.

There was the resignation in Johnny’s eyes, and that had hurt more than anything. 

He hadn’t fought for him. He had just _given up_.)

The look Johnny was giving him was strangely similar to the one he gave Ten years before, yet completely different, and Ten got taken aback by the intensity of it. 

“What if I want you?”

It was soft, a hushed whisper, almost as if Johnny was afraid to say it out loud. Ten wanted to scream.

He wanted to punch him, to ask him why he never said so before, why now—when everything was so much more difficult for the both of them, why he waited to corner him in the corridor of a space station—while his fellow space marines were taking over and Ten had to find his way back to his crew-mates and their ship—to tell him the one thing he had been dying to hear from him for years. The one thing that would have made him _stay_.

He wanted to scream, to punch him, but most of it he wanted to kiss him like there was no tomorrow, like they weren’t hiding in a corner, like they were back at the Academy and they had _hopes_ and _dreams_ and they thought they could have a future _together_. 

When they had been **fools**.

He didn’t know what his own eyes reflected but Johnny smiled, the same exact sad smile he had given him that fateful night.

(“I guess I have to wish you the best then?”

“You’re an idiot, Johnny Suh.”

“I know.”)

Johnny cupped the side of his face then and Ten almost wished his heart wouldn’t soar at the touch. He instinctively leaned into the touch, as he had many times before, eyes boring into Johnny’s, trying to pull apart every little emotions he could see in them : sadness, pain, regret, fondness, affection.

Hope.

Ten realized that Johnny was _hoping_ for this to lead somewhere—for this instant to actually have a meaning—and he did not know if he wanted the same thing. 

(He did.)

Ten took a shuddering breath and before he could realize he was engulfed in Johnny. It felt like a warm blanket, grounding him in the best way possible. He felt like _home_. Ten closed his eyes. He just wanted to stay with him forever, without a care about the world around them, hidden away from anyone trying to get in their way. 

At some point, he had thought they could have changed the world, together, hand in hand, working from the inside. Reality had hit him. _Hard_.

Yet Johnny still hoped, always.

“Johnny.”

His voice was barely above a whisper, not wanting to break the moment. He wasn’t sure what the moment was, but he was certain he had to hold on to it as much as he could. Johnny only held him closer.

“Johnny.”

This time it was a bit louder, but Johnny made no intentions to move. Ten opened his eyes but didn’t try to push him away. Time was sleeping between his fingers and he could see it. They weren’t at the Academy anymore.

(Even then, they had to hide away.)

“It’s too late for us.”

He could feel the tears coming and he stubbornly stared at the ceiling, in a vain attempt to hold them at bay. His words, however, had the intended effect as Johnny finally released Ten from his embrace—he kept his hands on Ten’s arms—and looked at him again.

“It’s never too late, Ten.”

The way his name rolled off Johnny’s tongue sent a shiver down his spine. At some point, he would have done absolutely anything to hear it—he would never admit so out loud—and even after all this time, the power Johnny had on him was undeniable. 

“Look at us: we’re on two opposite sides. You’re a Space Marine and I’m just another outlaw you’re supposed to put behind bars. One that is consistently in the most troublesome parts of the galaxy, too. No matter how you turn this, it’s impossible.”

“But we keep meeting, don’t we?”

“You mean like some cruel joke from the universe to remind us of what we were? What we could have been? I’m not who I was back then, Johnny, you neither.”

“But my feelings haven’t changed.”

Ten fell silent. That was the root of the problem, wasn’t it? Johnny’s feeling had not changed, when Ten’s did. But when Johnny looked at him the same way he used to back then, Ten felt his heart melt. All the anger, the resentment, the pain, washing away by a simple look of fondness from the man he held so close to his heart.

("I hate him" he would say out loud. "You love him" would his heart reply, the filthy liar.)

Johnny looked at him with so many expectations and hope that Ten felt his resolve falter and his heart jump in his throat. He wanted to say that his feelings did, that no he did not remotely like Johnny anymore, but the words wouldn’t leave his mouth and he could hear the whispers calling him a liar.

“Mine haven’t either.”

Ten’s voice was so small that it was a miracle Johnny heard it. But heard it he did and the smile which graced his face right after was absolutely priceless.

But no matter how many times he could see this smile, this face, this man, and how he would move a mountain for him in a heartbeat, the reality would hit him in the gut right after. 

Ten could feel his eyes burning with unshed tears but he blinked to will them away in the hopes Johnny wouldn’t notice. That idea flew out the window the moment it came to Ten's mind : Johnny had always noticed everything.

“Ten.”

His voice got low, keeping some intimacy just for them, or at least as much as they could in a space station that was about to get overrun by space marines.

“Don’t cry, _babe_ , please.”

The pet name must have slipped in an attempt to comfort, and Ten’s heart did a flip. His feelings weren’t in check anymore and all restraint was gone. So he did the first thing that came to his mind.

He pulled Johnny in for a kiss.

It started soft, two lips pressed against each other but it quickly changed to something deep, full of desperation and years of pent up frustration and hurt. Ten’s hand quickly found their spot in Johnny’s hair, and Johnny pulled at Ten’s waist—a perfect rendition of the same dance they used to do years ago. 

A single tear rolled down Ten’s cheek. A cruel reminder of the pain that could never be erased, of the choices they both made willingly. To Ten, Johnny had felt like home once; he also had felt like a cage. Now, he felt like both _hope_ and _despair_.

“... Sergeant Suh, where are you? Report.”

The voice came from Johnny’s space marine communication system. And just like that, their moment was over.

Ten quickly turned away from him but Johnny had already noticed the tear. He grazed Ten’s cheek with his thumbs, effectively taking the wetness away, and Ten willed his heart to stop beating so fast.

Mission failed: he blushed.

“You should go. They won’t let you go M.I.A for long.”

The sad smile that graced Johnny’s face was answer enough for the both of them, and Ten felt the same pain and hurt he did years ago. He looked around them, considering where exactly they were and how far he would have to go to avoid other space marines.

“Take the next corridor on the left, there’s a shortcut to the launchpad, you’ll get faster to your crew.”

Ten looked back at Johnny and only nodded. It held some kind of finality, now. They both knew their time was counted from the beginning and they were both stretching it out as much as they could.

“Goodbye, Johnny.”

Ten got out of their hiding spot in one quick motion and started running to the corridor Johnny had mentioned. He did find it and wasn’t surprised to find it actually was a shortcut, but the feeling of gratitude flooded him anyway. When he got to the launchpad and noticed his crew and their spaceship was still there, he couldn’t stop himself from looking back at the station. At his meeting with Johnny. At their parting.

He had meant to say _farewell_.

It held a sense of _promise_.

**Author's Note:**

> So, this might turn into something much bigger since I'm so inspired now. It fits really well with another project I have so maybe, there'll be more to it later? 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it!


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